They work hard, but we don't half like to take the piss!
The Navy Vs The Army
After passing the physical, the Doctor asked David, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?"
"My father said it'd be a good idea, sir." he replied.
"Oh? And what does your father do?"
"He's in the Army"
PMS
Why did the army send so many women with PMS to the Persian Gulf?
Because they fought like fucking animals and retained water for 4 days.
Leaving The Army
"I suppose," said the sergeant to the private, "that when you're discharged from the Army, you'll wait for me to die, just so you can spit on my grave."
"Not me," replied the private. "When I get out of the Army, I am never standing in line again."
Teaching In Iraq
Why don't they teach driving lessons and sex education in Iraq?
Because the camels would get too tired!
Messing With The Army
The first woman recruit in the Army reported for duty and was told that although her sleeping quarters would be in a separate building, she was to mess with the men.
It wasn't until a month later when someone finally told her that meant to eat her meals with them.
A Study Shows
The Pentagon once did a study on why so many American Servicemen marry foreign women in the countries where they're stationed. Contrary to popular belief, loneliness had nothing to do with it. Once the men went back home to the US, all their in-laws were thousands of miles away.