LOL send these funny txt msgs 2 ppl :-)

 

 

Friendship is like peeing your pants. Every1 can c it bt only u can feel it's true warmth. Thanku 4 bein the pee in my pants Xxx

 


 

 2day it's kwl 2 have small cars n small computers. Soon it will b kwl 2 have a small penis 2. U my friend will b da man!

 


 

 T-mobile regrets 2 inform that it has gone dwn on every1 bt u. We regret 2 inform u that no1 wud go dwn on u, nt even a network!

 


 

 Mary Mary quite contrairy how does ur garden grow. Listen u i live in a flat so how da fk do I know!

 


 

 Mirror mirror on da wall hu's da fairest of dem all. Da mirror laughed and den it spat-it sure aint u. U ugly prat!

 


 

 From da moment I saw u, I wanted 2 b inside u, I luv ur smell an da way ur tongue feels. Da way u tighten n loosen. Mmmm....new shoes!

 


 

 He came 2 me 1 nite, explored my body, licked, sucked, swallowed n had his fill. Wen satisfied he left. I was really hurt. Bloody mosquito!

 


 

 In da mornin I don't eat coz of u, at noon i don't eat coz of u, in da evenin I don't eat coz of u, but at night I don't sleep coz i'm hungry!

 


 

I had a wet dream about u last nite. I pissed myself laughin as u fell off a cliff!

 


 

 I luv da way it rubs against the soft pink flesh makin a creamy, foamy liquid, as it thrusts in n out, up n down. Cnt wait til nxt time, I luv my toothbrush!

 


 

 A man can kiss his wife gdbye. A flower can kiss a butterfly. Wine can kiss a frosted glass bt u mate can kiss my ass!

 


 

 A Boss says to an employee, "Experts say that humour during da recession can relieve tension. Knock knock..."

 

"Who's there?"

 

"Not u anymore!"

 


 

 3 chilps escaped from da zoo. 1 gt caught watchin football, another watchin tv n da 3rd was caught readin dis txt msg.